The Life You Live
& The Life You Want to Live
by Julie
Broad
 Resistance ...
Is there something scratching at your insides saying "This
isn't enough ... this isn't the life I want to
live? There's more to life. There's
more I want to do?"
I felt it everyday when I worked for someone else. I thought
maybe I just had to give more money to charity or devote myself
to a few good causes. But, even when I would raise thousands of
dollars for Breast Cancer, ALS or the SPCA I would still feel
uncomfortable that it wasn't enough. I sat on the board of the
Heart and Stroke foundation for awhile and that still didn't
satisfy the itch.
I thought maybe the resistance was a desire to achieve more
career success so I applied myself 100% to my job. I learned
what I needed to learn and I worked hard. And I rose up within
the organization to hold two different positions as Vice
President. Short of taking over the company from it's owner and
operating President, there was no where else to go within that
company. Yet, the itch was still there.
In fact, the more I tried to address this incredible
feeling that there was more to life, the worse it got.
Just like when you allow yourself to scratch a mosquito bite...
even just a little bit ... the itching gets ten times
worse.
The problem was that none of those things were really causing
the itch. None of those things were really the root issue of
the resistance I felt in my life.
At the time, I didn't really see it clearly. I sort of knew but
I wasn't certain. I had ideas but not a real plan. Until one
day a series of events unfolded in my job that led to me
sitting across from the President of the company discussing a
single piece of paper. This piece of paper had the 3 objectives
I was to achieve. The very specific financial results that he
expected of me to champion as Vice President of Sales and
Client Services. And under each objective were the the things
that I had to do to achieve those objectives.
This probably would have just been a bad day on the job, not
the day of my epiphany if it weren't for the fact that he also
told me these were the ONLY things he wanted me to do to
achieve those objectives AND I felt very strongly that it
wouldn't work. I believed a very different plan needed to be
made to reach the goals he had.
So there I was ... fully responsible for the financial results
but totally powerless over how I achieved (or didn't) achieve
them.
I felt like someone who had to go into a knife fight with my
feet and hands tied together. Sure you have wiggle room but so
little that unless you're Jason Bourne you're probably not
coming out of the fight victorious.
At that very moment I understood the resistance I had been
feeling for years. Like I said, I had always known but never
really allowed myself to see it clearly. I had ideas but not a
clear vision. But at that instant I became completely calm and
certain. I understood what I had to do.
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